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Don’t be so Quick to Throw People Away -Understanding the impact your actions have on someone suffer


The end of 2017 and the beginning of 2018 ushered in a sweeping trend of toxic removal. While limiting your interactions with toxic people can be a good thing, I beg you to consider and explore what makes this person toxic. Are they products of their environments or emotionally, physically and systematically oppressed? I was disheartened today as I heard Kanye West refer to slavery as a choice. He disregarded the beatings, emasculation and murders of our ancestors in effort to oppress, terrorize and cripple our people by shackling them not only in chains but in fear. Fear oftentimes is more powerful than the act of rebellion and the freedom to make a different choice. Those slaves who did exercise their resiliency and rebellious nature were met with public flogging and death as an example to the others to not challenge the system. In modern times, police brutality and killings of unarmed black men and women continue the oppression and mental crippling of black people. However, just what else have our people been taught or exposed to? What fears, behaviors, thoughts and thinking patterns have been passed down to us for generations?

Yes, we should each be responsible for ourselves and strive to make life easier and bearable for our families. However, we each have a moral obligation to our fellow man. Are you your brother’s keeper? Before you are so quick to throw someone away in the preservation of your own survival and comfort, consider what damage you may be causing to an already fragile individual. As with our ancestors not having a choice whether they wanted to be slaves, some individuals cannot make a choice to no longer be mentally ill. For a decision to made, one must realize they have a problem. After that, yes, the choice is easy in theory. Slaves realized they had a problem and some revolted and escaped their master’s plantation. Those who were scared into submission stayed behind and continued the day to day although they were brutally victimized and tortured. A person facing mental health issues may be able to recognize they have an issue, but years of negative programming and external risk factors may hinder their effectiveness and ability to change in the time frame you think they should.

Have you checked in lately? Have you made a point to inquire about that person’s well-being beyond the rhetorical, “how are you”? While you cannot be there for everyone, you can reach out to the ones who you know need someone. Everyone of us know someone who may experiencing tough times or “drama”. It is my guess they are not enjoying their situation and could use some help, even if its just a listening ear. Society tends to file away those individuals who are suffering and continue life as usual until something tragic occurs. Why must it get to a point of no return before we take some sort of responsibility? We are not on the planet alone and therefore should not only look out for ourselves but empower, uplift, and educate others. With May being Mental Health Awareness Month, I encourage you to reach out to someone, check in and just listen to what they may say beyond the normal. Do not accept “I’m fine,” as an answer. Look them in the eye and get the true answer.

Isolation is a telltale sign of a mental health issue. Some sufferers tend to stay to themselves out of fear of being a burden to others. When we, and I say we because I am a sufferer, are cut off it causes additional anxiety because now we must work to hide our issues so as to not alarm or annoy those around us. We isolate or ignore issues we should be able to talk about to become socially acceptable which is unhealthy as well as mentally and emotionally damaging. To avoid being social pariah or taking on the form of a swatted away fly amid the self-preservation trend, we do more damage to ourselves thus deepening our issues. It is important that we find someone we can trust and in whom we can confide. I ask each of you to be that person for someone before it’s too late.

As for Kanye, well don’t be so quick to throw this brother away either. He is exhibiting the modern day systematic oppression of brainwashing to believe there are no problems and that we are afforded the same opportunities as others. Free thinking equals narrow perspective and privileged thinking which makes it difficult to empathize with the struggles of others. As you can see the issue is much deeper and is rooted in self-hatred, insecurity and narcissism.

Until next time.

Namaste.

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